Nothing

This week was intense. Everything happened so fast.

I'm having doubts whether !@#$ does exist. With everything going around the world, my beliefs are starting to change its path. But whether which path i will took, i havent decide yet. I will put all my faith on the upcoming weeks. The next two weeks, i will decide on my mission and aim to accomplish it.

I hate it when you enter a room, then everyone in the room stares at you like you are a weirdo. I don't blame them for staring, i do it all the time.

I have just finished watching this show called iris. It was one of the best show i've watch. I do hope that something like this will happen in the future. And i wished to be a part of it. I do know that this is unrealistic, but it is possible in the present that it is happening.

Honestly, i have never ever think of doing engineering, accounting, etc. I am not curious of how it feels like of doing this kind of job. The only job that i feel curious is the feeling of becoming a part of an organization that is a secret to the society. Something like alqaeda but with different targets. Something that is important and something that you can put your life on. I know that in my current state, it seems impossible and very ambitious but sometimes i feel that.......

For me, if there were something good to happen, i need to sacrifice something first. It has always been my fate. Nothing good ever happens to me without a sacrifice or something i would lose. Well sometime ago, i was doing this computer exam that i had to complete to begin the next level. While waiting for the exam, i had to sit with unknown people in that room. Because they were all waiting to do their exam. And you know in every story there are always a girl or a boy. As i sat down, looking at her several times. My fate was already set. I know that in order to get that girl, i had to sacrifice something. And that sacrifice must be the same level as getting that girl. I finally conclude that there were two choices for me at that same day. It was either passing the exam or getting the girl. I had to choose between them two. But i decide that choosing to pass the exam is more wise. Because of my schedule, if i had failed the exam, everything will be messed up, my schedule will need to be reschedule. So i didn't want to fail the exam, so i concentrate on passing that exam. After passing the exam, i tried to find the girl but it was too late.

Oh darn school starts soon, i wish my school would just explode. I guess that i went to the wrong school. I don't know why fate set me this school.

Missed the chance again!!

Well today i went to the Metro Driving Academy. To get my L licence. That wasn't my only objective, i wanted to do an experiment. I wanted to wink at any girl that im interested to see their reaction. Well, i know this sounds silly and pathetic but this experiment could change me. Well so as i arrived at the academy, i quickly looked around to see if they were any hot girls. But there were none. But i still had hope, there have to be a hot girl in this acedemy. After i had registered, i went to the room where the teacher would teach us about some stuff. So when i went in but it was still empty, so i looked around and find a good spot i can sit where i could see all the people. I had to find a good view of the room. SO i sat down and wait for people to come in. As i heard someone opening the door, my head swiftly goes to the direction of the door and wait patiently for someone to come in. As people keep coming in, i prayed that someone hot would come in. But as time gone by, there were none. There were only old people and guys and girls that aren't my type. The room quickly filled up with people. I began losing hope...My neck was very tired cause of everytime the door opens my head would turn around. Finally, a girl came to the room. I observed every detail of her. SHe was what i imagined her to be. She was the one i was looking for. She had the most beautiful hair and her hair was just spectacular. She was shorter than me which is hard to find. She is malay. And i didn't really see her face clearly. But from far, she was the one. She looked like an angel. I knew she was the one. Then like 10 seconds ago..she went out the room because it was full. I screamed so loud inside my brain. Then she had to go to another room because my room was full. SHe was in my brain for the entire lesson. AT recess, i went out of the room, then i saw her on the hallway, she was walking towards me, as i was gonna open my mouth , people behind me were very noisy, i had also prayed if she will look me in the eye so i could do the wink. But she never did. Then she went to her room and i never saw her again until the end of class. It was 4.20 pm.. I was tired. I had to finish my experiment. I had to do the wink to someone. As the instructor ask me to go into the car, i went to the door and went in. As i sat down in the car, I quickly just made eye contact with the girls in front of me. Btw they were also attractive but wasnt my kind. I look closely at the girls eyes and tries to make them see me. But they never saw me. Damn, how can i do my wink if no one is looking at me? As the driver starts its engine..there i saw that perfect girl walking towards the entrance door. I was like....wah....there she is.....the perfect girl. Damn, i was just 20 seconds late. Since then, i regret for not doing anything. I should have done something. I failed...i always fail...i am a failure. That is a fact.